Online copy writing is tricky business. Potential pitfalls become more evident when strangers correspond. When people don’t know each other, there’s no trust and no relationship so tone important. You must go out of your way to be polite or things can go sour in a click. The conversation below from a Microsoft Community is a great example. I found it because I had the same question as Sharon. The conversation that erupts after Sharon’s simple question is hysterical and instructive.
Sharon’s Question:
If you suspect that the sender has bcc’d an email you received, is there any way to verify that they have and to who
I was wondering…If you suspect that the sender has bcc’d an email you received, is there any way to verify that they have and to who?
I was wondering this too Sharon, thank you for asking.
Brian:
The very nature of Bcc is that you cannot tell who else was included as a recipient. “Bcc” stands for “blind carbon (or courtesy) copy”. It wouldn’t be very blind if you could tell there were other recipients and who they were.
A simple NO wasn’t good enough. Brian felt the need to throw in a pinch of sarcasm.
Gordon:
No. Why would there be? That would completely negate the point of BCC…..
Gordon could have left it alone, but as you’ll see, he thinks he owns MS Communities. Answering a question with a question always leaves open the inference, “Answer my smart question and you’ll know the answer to your stupid question.”
Sharon:
Thank you for your response Brian- I do of course understand what bcc stands for, otherwise I would not have posed the question. I know our company has eliminated the reply all function but there are ways around that as well. My mistake was thinking I could get an professional response from this venue. Apparently this site is for belittling people who ask good question in an effort to make them feel better about themselves. I don’t think I am interested in being a part of this group any longer.
Sharon is bruised because neither Brian nor Gordon actually answered with a NO, they said the question is too stupid to even say no to.
Gordon
The reason there IS no way of telling is because the addresses in the BCC field do not leave the sender’s computer.
Sorry, if you don’t like the answers then that’s your problem not ours.
The first part of Gordon’s response would have been a perfectly appropriate first response. But then he slaps her for taking offence to his offense.
Brian
I don’t know what you think in my response was in any way belittling. I simple stated a fact. There is no way to tell if there were any recipients included via Bcc, pure and simple.
But Brian stated a fact that did not directly answer her question. You defined BCC, she wanted to know if there’s a way around BCC. She did not ask for a definition. Like Gordon, after he’s insulted Sharon and defends the insult, he does give her an answer.
Note that at this point Brian and Sharon leave the conversation to the Trolls.
Rutherford (darts in)
Sharon’s question is perfectly reasonable. The fact that it never crossed your mind shows just how flaccid and vapid your mind is.
Microsoft should be ashamed to have combative, ignorant, and condescending posts like yours on it’s website.
Your personality is your problem, but you have made it Microsoft’s as well.
If you don’t like helping people by providing thoughtful answers to reasonable questions, then that’s your problem not ours 😉
Best of luck on crafting polite responses to future inquiries or on finding something else to do with your time.
Rutherford is one of those trolls who jumps into a fight and kicks someone in the ribs who’s knocked out on the ground.
Gordon:
May I suggest you look at my profile before you make such ridiculous assertions?
I have nearly FIVE THOUSAND posts marked as answers – I see you have made NO POSTS OTHER THAN THIS ONE.
Gordon is a territorial troll, he believes that this forum is his bridge to lurk under and he has five thousand posts to prove it.
No More Mr Mean Guy (chimes in to stoke the fire)
I respectfully disagree with one thing. You should stay. He reminds me of one of those “HowTo” sites.
You’ll ask a good question. e.g. “How to Connect a NAS device to U-verse blah blah blah…”
Ans:
1) Buy NAS Storage
2) Follow Intructions 3) Use NAS
(For all the nerds..I had to build an HKEY because Win7…If you know a better way I don’t care)
I’m not overly disgrutled. Mildly….hardly even grutling. We should just all strive to provide intelligent answers when intelligent people ask them…or stupid people for that matter.
Great response Sharon. Love to see a verbal joust or in this case a one punch knock out.
No More is really a troll but wants to look like a sage.
Gordon:
.I know Gordon B-P is an angry little idiot based on a comment he made in 2011. We all know!
Gordon is losing his grip but can’t leave the fight.
Dailen (comes in like a piranha on drowning pig)
I’m gonna have to agree, both of you (community star and moderator) are acting extraordinarily rude. It’s that kind of condescending attitude that makes computer techs get a bad rep. That’s exactly why people don’t like talking to computer professionals. And Gordon, the only thing that having 5000+ messages on here shows is that you spend WAAAAY too much time on here.
Righteous indignation must be given a voice.
No More Mr Mean Guy:
Wonderful. You replied. This is the part like the most. I seriously doubt you have what it takes to deliver a valid point but I’m intrigued. Lets start with why you called me a liar. I never lied about a thing. Lets see if you can handle this question before I waste my time on you.
No more smells blood and he’s convinced he’s on the high road.
Gordon:
If you really think that posting proper replies and then getting a bit shirty when ” Sharon” won’t accept the correct answer is rude, then you have a very strange concept of what is “rude”.
And as to 5000 answers, do the maths. That equates to THREE posts a DAY on average…
OK – I’ll take your bait just for the fun of it to see you wriggle.
Here’s what you posted –
“I know Gordon B-P is an angry little idiot based on a comment he made in 2011. We all know!!”
As you’ve only been a member here for a few days, and offer no evidence for your statement then until you do, I still say you are a liar, hiding behind a pseudonym. (And if you don’t know what that means, look it up).
Gordon sees a chink in the armor and thrusts his sword home.
No more is wounded but desperate to keep the manure flinging contest going. But Gordon frustrates him and goes silent, content that he has mortally wounded his foe.
No More Mr. Mean Guy:
Post 1 – Bait him with name calling
Failed. Actually before I start..you remind me of a bratty little child.
OK. I seems you want to twist things a bit and make it appear that I somehow made a claim than I have been a member for longer than a day. I did not. I did say you I know you are an idiot based off something you said two years ago simply because the date. Why would that matter anyway? So not only did you fall for the bait you proved once again….forget it. Be angry little man. Whatever works for you. Oh and the little bit about not knowing the definition of your favorite grown up word…really?
Log off man
You do not serve a purpose
You are not helpful
Game over..
No reply by Gordon – Post 2 – Appeal to his better angels to get him talking again.
I’ll bury the hatchet and reach out to you.
No reply by Gordon – Post 3 – Desperation leads him to threaten his existence on the site by appealing to the crowd as a last resort.
I would encourage anyone who runs across someone like Gordon to report him/her. It is very easy to do and for that extra few seconds of time you will make this site more informative and valuable. Read the thread and decide for yourself.
Hit the jackpot on #3!
Gordon:
Oh yeah? Over 5000 marked as answers.
Then David ruins the party:
Hi everyone,
I am locking this thread. it has run its course from answering the user’s question and into violations of the Microsoft Community Code of Conduct. My intent is to keep the community civil.
The lessons in writing to a stranger:
1. Be overtly polite. Add a greeting of welcome and a thank you for posting.
2. Answer the question asked directly and with kindness.
3. Don’t take offense too quickly. If the answer to your question is not clear, perhaps your question is not clear. Restate it with patience.
4. Don’t feed the trolls. Trolls live on your anger. They’re just ugly, wrinkled little souls who are best left to talk to themselves under their bridge.
(Read the complete text of this conversation here – http://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/office/forum/office_2010-outlook/if-you-suspect-that-the-sender-has-bccd-an-email/0347125a-b108-4b6b-b43c-ef1e35b00262?msgId=8997e7e5-d053-4289-9bfd-a5d795e40974&page=3 )